Careless Banter — “If You Na Able to Tote the Liberian People Pepper Kinjah, Jes Put It Down Easy Yah, Papa!

1
759

Says one to the other, “I have got news for you.”

“Good news or bad news?” queries the other in response.

“Both,” comes the instant reply.

“Well,” says the other, “let’s hear the bad news first and then the good news.”

“Well, alright the bad news first. The bad news: corruption and impunity appear to be exercising a choke-hold on the nation — runaway corruption, that is. The investigation into the missing money continues, but, that is about all the public knows and guess what? There is still no evidence or paper trail on how the US$25 million was infused into the economy.”

“Wait a minute here,” says the other; “what do you mean by there is no evidence or paper trail? Do you mean to tell me that our man the Finance Minister did not place that money into the banking system? I can’t believe it, mehn!”

“Oh yes,” the first one continued, “the Finance Minister gave the commercial banks wah-way; he gave them okra. Rock he did not give them.”

“Aye bah!” the other exclaims, “this kind of thing can spoil our man Weah name o, because they will say he inside it because he has not done anything about it.”

“Okay,” says the first, “but this country here, anything you do to anybody, it can go for free. Ehn you see the Housing Authority man Siryon, his name all in the press oh; they say someone recorded him on tape asking the Burkinabé man for his gbeh-to-gbeh-to.”

“What you mean by gbeh-to-gbeh-to?”

“Oh, I mean the man lay thing. Aye my people, this corruption business killing this country oh! It waste bad way –corruption waste in Liberia yaaaah!”

“But ehn our King George say he will not take side with corruption people? He talked it the time he was getting in the chair. But from the time he talk it, we can’t see nothing sef.”

“Oh, you pah, you can’t give our man chance sef, to see if he will waste water under them?

“Okay oh, I will give him chance but the thing that’s hurting me, it na reach one year yet, so-so chopping business we can be hearing in the news. Our money oh; dey people chopping the Liberian people money voogah-voogah and nothing can’t come from inside. Bah, me pah, I na give up on this country yah; people chopping bastard money — nothing coming from it. Dey na kill kill, oh. Dey kill people oh, and nothing come from inside.

“But wait bah, you nah hear the good news yet?”

“Oh, no oh! I na go nowhere today. Radio sef, I nah put it on.

“Oh bah, you behind time oh. You jes cockin’ in crib whole day? You nah hear AFL Chief of Staff talking today dat, any monkey try to cause problem here to say he will jump in the bush because they call him to war crimes court, the AFL will deal with them?”

“Oh for true?”

“Yes oh! Ehnn, because I na finish packing my bag, so if any bush shake, I gone. I will nah wait for it to reach to me sef!”

“So you mean the AFL say it will protect the Liberian people? I hope so oh!”

“Oh yes oh, tactical dat different tactical na oh.”

“Yes bah, the Liberian people tired with war. Dey will never jump in the bush again but, if this government nah want do anything for us dey gbana man dem, the Zogos dem; the bastard chopping, the gbeh-to-gbeh-to business, the wah-way, the crocrogee business, the kukujumuku business and the jolly jolly, chay dey ni pehn kanon business must stop. Get serious, damn serious, we taya mehn!”

“If you nah able to tote the Liberian people pepper kinjah, jes put it down easy yah, Papa!”

[Of course, momentary silence, then sudden and explosive, laughter, raucous, coarse and unrestrained!]

1 COMMENT

  1. What is even unfunny about this corruption spree still going on in Liberia plus all the other unwholesome practices, is that King George harassed the Liberian people so much for this one presidency, telling them he is the one God chose to redeem the country from corruption. And here he is not even one year in power yet, and look at the mess he keeps putting us in. The sad thing I notice about George Wean, is that apparently he is so dull to the extent he doesn’t even know personally if anything is going wrong around him, that is until someone tells him. At least, people like Ellen and all the other previous presidents including even Sgt. Doe, could tell by themselves if something was not right. But for King George, somebody else has to tell him and not only tell him, but explain it to him in simple English. And instead of trying to improve himself in running government and to conduct himself as president, he continues to roll with good time. Sometimes even flying all over the place to watch football games like some teenager. While we pray that nobody stages another coup in Liberia, it is obviously people like George Weah and by virtue of the stupid manner he’s conducting the affairs of the country that do justify those kinds of drastic measures as quick fixes. Every time one reads about unfolding events in Liberia on these news outlets, they just make your blood boil. But TWT.

Leave a Reply