The Dangers of War

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Sam Lonestar was no animal. He cried like all men and sought the comfort of the female sex, like all men. But his encounter with his beautiful Mamie and her eventual tragic death took the people by storm.

There were several women who, having read the narration, felt that there was more to it than meet the eye. Three days after he went public with his story, Sam sat at his residence in Atlanta, thinking about many things. In particular, he had been amused by the reactions from several Liberian women, those who felt he contributed to Mamie’s adventurous death, and those who, however, felt she deserved what she got.

In a reaction to Sam Lonestar’s narration above, a young Liberian mother, who had celebrated her natal day a couple of days ago, spoke her mind. Published on the internet, Lonestar, who had come to visit with me in my apartment, pulled the document of the woman’s reaction and scanned it.

For enjoyment purpose, Sam Lonestar’s story was good, but, I do not understand the premise for which Lonestar wanted to paint a bad picture of Mamie, his New Kru Town girlfriend. Lonestar was the 1st man to have abused the beauty of Mamie. In the story, Lonestar loved Mamie and even had a child with Mamie but in no part of the story depicted that Mamie and Lonestar were married. I am left to believe that Lonestar was not man enough to have crowned Mamie with his name! Were Mamie’s beauty and inner self not good enough to have been called Mrs. Lonestar? Or should I say Lonestar was holding onto the ring so that Mamie would be a perpetual prisoner of his so-called love? Or the fact that she was from New Kru Town and to be married to Lonestar was not her destiny, rather serve his lust?

In relationships, there is a wonderful thing called commitment. It comes with a vow of marriage. When you stand at the Altar and commit yourself to another person, temptation will come your way but when you are a woman who has been honored by another human being, a man who forgot all the other women to put his name on your……after your father’s name, you look back on your vows and your vows will be your saving grace from temptation. Even if you fall and you sincerely ask for forgiveness, God will forgive you and restore you, as God restored the Psalmist. Lonestar expressed his love or shall I say lust for Mamie.

Real love means respect. He did not dignified Mamie and made her a real woman. The same reason he wanted Mamie, was the same reason the ECOMOG man wanted Mamie. His initial disrespect for Mamie created the mental breakdown in Mamie’s head for self-respect, leading her to use her body as a money maker.

Perhaps Lonestar was Mamie’s, 1st love. Lonestar provided for Mamie and became her breadwinner as a way of keeping her mentally enslaved so that his lust for her body can be quenched until he too decided to leave Mamie once her body was all wrinkled with stretched marks from having babies from his lust. After that, he would have tossed her aside for the next New Kru Town girl who was willing to be his next victim.

With the initial mindset that Lonestar instilled in Mamie, she was better to go after more money from other men while her body was used. Withholding marriage and marital vows from Mamie, having a child by Mamie made Mamie have come to the conclusion that there was no love there! There was lust! Lust means you give me, I give you! If anyone killed Mamie or caused her to die, it was Lonestar, her 1st love who did not respect and dignified her beauty by taking her in front of an Altar of God and making men witnesses by declaring his love in marriage. Yet he talks about the Aids he caused Mamie to have acquired from another man.

Had he dignified Mamie, perhaps none of this would have happened to her. Lonestar can write all he wants to exonerate himself from Mamie’s death but he caused her to die! Even in death, he is willing to talk about his lust and gossip and snickered about Mamie because he thinks she is dead. She is not. Her legacy is a lesson! He even went to see Mamie near the Johnson Street Bridge and was still giving her his HAND-ME-DOWN chump-change!!! As he heard and listened to the gossip about Mamie, Mamie was actually teaching women to stay away from men like Lonestar. Mamie sat at the Johnson Street Bridge to show women what they would become once they accepted the social love of men like Lonestar. The end result will be going after another man once the LUSTER becomes a BROKER. Lonestar forgot the part that many women are actually laughing behind his back!!!

There are many of us from New Kru Town who could smell Lonestar miles away. Lonestar’s attitude is the primary behavior of men towards New Kru Town girls. Because of their perception of what New Kru Town girls are; beautiful to lust after but not good enough to marry. There are girls from New Kru Town who have grown up to womanhood who did not let men like Lonestar come near them.

Their parents knew better than to accept the “bread-winner -smooth-talk.” Those ones who stayed away from the Lonestars of this world are happily married for many, many years. Yes, they all faced the same temptation that Mamie faced, but the honor bestowed upon them by their 1st love took them from New Kru Town and honored them with their name in marriage and stabilized their minds to reality when they too were tempted to go astray like Mamie.
In the Bible, Jesus was tempted by the Devil who promised to give him the whole world if he will just worship him. But Jesus’ love for God sustained him because there is a Covenant between God and Jesus. If Jesus can be tempted, then all of us will be tempted but it is our covenant that keeps us in check.

This is the same reason that when one needs something from God and that thing which one needs is within the confines of God’s covenant; God will have no other choice but to release the promise. The Devil lust after Jesus to love and worship him but Jesus had a greater commitment and love.

The love and respect his Father gave him was too powerful to betray. Any relationship that was built on money and the man being the winner enslaves the mind of the woman. That kind of love is not true love. This is why destitute women who benefited from such relationships are the victims of the gossip of society because, in their state of destitution, they mistake lust for love. For reference, watch the Liberian Movie, “IMPORTED BRIDE.” This movie should clear the eyes of men who are not looking for equal partners in marriage but looking for someone to show their supremacy to. Sooner than later, little girls grow up to be women. There are so many Mamies out there.

They have been abused by men to their graves. The man is the head of the house and the woman is the helpmate. Teach your wife or your betrothed to be self-sufficient so, in the days that your hand is gone down, she too will lift you up because she bears your name.

Many of us would have fallen prey to Mamie’s fate! Thank God a man saw us good enough to put their names on our……………..that we should think twice and hard before dicing and kicking them to the curb.
MAMIE, MAY YOUR SOUL REST IN PERFECT PEACE AND KNOW YE THAT YOU ARE A “GREAT TEACHER” IN LIFE!

1 Peter 3
Wives and Husbands

1. Wives, in the same way, be submissive to your husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, 2. When they see the purity and reverence of your lives. 3. Your beauty should not come from outward adornments, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. 4. Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.

5. For this is the way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to make themselves beautiful. They were submissive to their own husbands. 6. Like Sarah, who obeyed Abraham and called him her master. you are her daughters if you do what is right and do not give way to fear.

Husbands, in the same way, be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers.”

— Celia

“What defense do you have?” I asked him, sitting down as if he had lost his relative in death, across from me. Sam, I could see, was in deep thought. The examples from Celia’s letter had brought home so many fond memories. But was it true that he was only interested in Mamie’s beauty, as alleged? Did he care for her so much, and if that was true according to his narrative, why did he not marry her in the first place?

It appeared that my friend was in some mental anguish, for I could see him pointing his right finger to a portion of Celia’s letter that he felt did not take his situation into account. “Mamie was the love of my life,” he told me, his eyes wide, “there was no question  that I would have wanted her to be my wife.” Here he could not continue, and I thought the memory of Mamie’s tragic death had intruded into his mind. There were tears also in his eyes.

“When my son was born,” he said afterward, “it was right in the war, and when the boy did not survive, I discovered to my horror that there was another man in the relationship.” Sam gave a deep breath, and I could see him wipe tears from his face. We were sitting at my apartment in Lawrenceville. Sam sat across from me, and since both of us had our days off, we were sharing some time together. I sauntered to the refrigerator and came back with a bottle of Guinness Stout, his favorite, and gave it to him. Sam’s eyes brightened when he said, in continuation to his story, and the tragic story of Mamie, “You know I was now a poor man since I no longer had a job.”

I placed my right hand on his shoulder, and it was like I was saying, go on, brother, say it all.

“I was surviving on United Nation’s food distribution, and I was also involved with the SELF, the local NGO that was sharing food to all of Monrovia,” he said, “I could have married her, but the condition was not right for me.”

“Did you really love Mamie?” I said, in an attempt to force my friend to come all out. He gulped in the bitter drink and made a face before he replied to my question.

“For real love, I had for her,” he said, “I did not love her for her beauty, as Celia conjectured, and all my buddies in New Kru Town could attest to the unconditional love I had for her.”

“I can see that there was a commitment in your relationship…”

“Yes,” he interrupted me, “I might not have been a one hundred percent Christian, but I knew true love and gave it to her. We discussed our future, after the war…” Sam broke off again, and he nursed the bottle of Guinness Stout, and there was a flicker of light in his eyes.

I was being affected by my friend’s action, believing that he was deeply in love with Mamie, the mother of his son who did not survive the Liberian civil war. I realized that my friend’s glass was empty, and I moved to refill it. Personally, I have had some relationships, some good, others bad, which was the reason I could understand my friend’s feelings. In all our discussion, Sam never said any derogatory word about his late friend.

On several occasions, he blamed the Liberian society, as another Liberian lady, Sylvester Payne commented when she said, “our society encourages young women into relationships when they are still babies.”

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